Sometimes as a friend we get so used to asking our friends “What’s wrong..?” “Come talk to me..” whenever they have a problem. And we’ll realize that sometimes the more they speak of their problems the more agitated it can get for them. How comforting it is rather, to someone who doesn’t hear much of a careless solution but a sincere listening ear and a reminder of certainty that Allah ﷻ will help them in all their affairs. We do not have the authority, neither do we, weak souls, take in full responsibility upon others.
We need a fine balance in both. Just like Shaykh Abdul Aziz Fredrerick says, Both (tafakur) and having someone to talk to, co-reflect, giving and receiving sincere nasiha. The Prophet ﷺ said, “This religion is sincere advice.” We said “To whom?” He ﷺ said, “To Allah, His book, His messenger, and to the leaders of the Muslims and the common folks.” And that it is very important to have a sahabah (sincere company) and to not shun off everyone every time.
“Being alone is better than bad company and good company is better than being alone. To say something good is better than remaining silent but remaining silent is far better than saying something evil.” (Hadith, Bayhaqi)
But we also need to have a little distance to place everything in perspective and to have (Ilm al-yaqin), knowledge of certainty. “If they knew with the knowledge of certainty, …. then you will surely see it with the eye of certainty.” (Qur’an, 102:6) And that sometimes when too much information destroys our mind that it can bring us doubt, then we need to fill ourselves with knowledge. The search of certainty is actually the search of a healthy heart. That “None of you will come to Allah ﷻ in a state of happiness unless if it is in a state of salim (whole and healthy).”
“Give up what is doubtful to you for that which is not doubtful; for truth is peace of mind and falsehood is doubt”. (Hadith, Tirmidhi)
You don’t love someone enough if you don’t make dua for them. Insya Allah with this, we are able to help ourselves and each other better. Do yourself a favour, seek knowledge. May we be among those who knows the truthful.