The husband of a super-mum may feel rejected, especially if he depends on his wife to provide meaning for his life. He may feel that a baby, especially a son – is a rival, yet he may avoid his wife’s need for intimacy, support or responsibility. He may become depressed and/or obsess about intimate affairs with young women.
An enmeshed child should work on cutting the cords and letting go of their mothers to allow their mothers in working on her own unsatisfied marriage and self-worth.
An enmeshed child may look like this,
“The only woman I truly loved was another man’s wife …My Mother. I was having a subconscious affair with my mother as she wanted me to fulfil her emotional needs that only her spouse should fill. No wonder my father resented me, and felt unsatisfied in his marriage because his own wife did not concern herself in working on her own marriage.”
The enmeshed child will also bring forth unsuccessful intimacy between his or her own spouse in the future. Preoccupying themselves with serving his or her mother’s needs their whole life, neglecting his or her spouse’s needs. Either fearing commitment or happiness in order to not feel guilty of his or her betrayal towards his or her mother. Or fearing responsibilities over his or her own feelings, therefore outwardly expressing it in an immature way. Often influencing the very one thing they fear, abandonment.
Can I cry! (see I still have feelings okay)
I hope that someday I can write something spiritual about this.